Where I’m At Right Now

4 min read

2017 will absolutely be another year of transition for me. I am basically starting my life over. A reboot, if you will. How many have I gone through already? I’ve lost count!

I asked for this. I very easily could have stayed where I was, 527 miles from my family with whom I am reasonably close to, professionally stagnant and itching for new challenges. I look back at my life thus far, and everything I’ve ever done, I’ve asked myself if I was ready, agonized over it, played out the worst case scenarios in my head when I was awake, when I was asleep. But I made those decisions. There were no outside influences. I may come from a highly patriarchal culture, but the one thing I’ve always appreciated about my parents is their lack of “stage parenting.” They never pushed me or my siblings to be this, or that. If we wanted to do or be something, they let us do it (within reason). They offered advice if we asked for it. But we’re Pachecos. And stubborn. We don’t take nobody’s advice!

I read this quote on Reddit (also today’s featured image) within the past week and it stuck with me. I saved it to my Google Keep, and created a poster for it. Nothing fancy. It says:

I’ve busted my ass to get where I need to go, and I’ll bust it again to get where I’m going.

A very telling quote about how I see this stage in my life. I have it posted next to my desk as a reminder that this path, this journey, is no one’s but my own.

I’m currently conducting a full-time job search. I am a professional writer, but the writing life does not afford me the comfort of being solely a writer. I have faith. I am content to know that I will have to balance a full-time job with my writing life in order to support myself. I knew full well what I was getting into when I went down this path. The burn has healed over in my head. I have not gotten any phone calls. I guess I’m not the candidate they’re looking for, or if my bruised ego wants to believe, they’re simply too busy with their current workloads. That’s usually how it was at my previous positions. We would be a skeleton crew, dead busy, and the manager could never interview people fast enough. I’m very familiar with this scenario, and I hope that’s why.

My days aren’t a complete loss. In between the job search, I’ve been unpacking, rearranging my closet and furniture, cleaning, napping, and getting back into exercising. It might not work for everybody, but I am loving the Wii U Fit game. It comes with a pedometer, so I wear it whenever I take care of Jack. It’s fun to add the steps I’ve walked to the Fit Meter challenges. The new games are a lot of fun and it’s nice to see the old favorites. I used the Wii Fit consistently before I moved and it put me in a good frame of mind when it came to my health and nutrition. I wouldn’t say I lost that frame of mind (I actually ended up losing 10 lbs. during my 2 year grad program) but seeing the tangible results through the game is what I need. I tried using apps but I could never get into it. But I know what I’m capable of when it comes to that. I plan on living forever. I need to make it easier for my immortal self by maintaining a healthy body!

I’ve also been channeling my days rebuilding and beefing up my online presence. I felt it was time to embrace that and use it. I maintained it during my grad program but it didn’t have a focus. The product I am selling is me, I am my own brand. That made it easier to see how they’ll all interact. I’m fully aware of the audience I am trying to attract.

I opened up a separate Facebook page to promote my literary citizenship, though my literary citizenship involves a lot of different topics. I have a lot of plans for it. I love the name. I found a random name generator and plugged in “writer.” It tacked on different suffixes, and Writeropolis spoke to me because it reminded me of Metropolis. My Pinterest was always a business, though I never developed it much. I created a mailing list, and I hope to release a monthly newsletter on the 18th of every month. I arbitrarily chose it because it’s my birth date. I have loads of article ideas to post here too. I’ll be going about my day and I’ll experience something and say to myself, “that would make a great article!” Those are the best ideas when you least expect it.

Overall, it felt weird coming home. I felt like I was on vacation the whole time I was in my grad program. I guess that’s a good thing but it also feels like my life here in Vegas was frozen in time. Slipping back in wasn’t so hard. But getting the reboot going is tough work. I’m ready.

4 Comments

  1. I think that we all learn as we go. Even when we fail, these learnings should stay with us and that is what I would tell you too. Where ever you are right now, go with the flow and keep going. Making the most of what you have got.

    • Thank you Parul! I’ve learned a lot in the past two years, as far as what I am capable of. That’s excellent advice and I hope to heed it as I keep moving forward.

  2. Humaira Ahmad

    Nothing good in life ever comes easy. The heroe’s real journey begins when the story ends and they have to come home.

    • Thank you Humaira! I was definitely feeling very much like the prodigal daughter when I was realizing it was time to come home. Very humbling but it also made me realize that I can do anything.

Navigate